Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize