life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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