I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize