it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
