I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
