Dual....:-)
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize