Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
We left an ass print on the piano.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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