idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
The feeling are messing with the penis
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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