Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
