Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize
