You're a womanizer and a bitch.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize