dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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