I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
