Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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