Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
