They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize