So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
