Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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