I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
