Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
God, I missed his penis.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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