he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize
