Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
