If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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