Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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