But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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