I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
