I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Damn victory sex feels great
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
