where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
How's work?
Spinning.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
