I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
She told me I should be a condom model.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
My bed smells like the plague
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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