I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I will pee on everything he values.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You can't just leave with hair like that
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize