some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
