whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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