The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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