Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
