I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize