You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Randomize
