It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize