Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Randomize
