the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
