I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
