summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
