My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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