a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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