im six kinds of drunk right now
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Randomize
