Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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