Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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