Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
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