I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
