It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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