I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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